


Little Brother

by Kanokko



Category: No Straight Roads (Video Game)
Genre: 1010pile, AI Philosophy, Androids, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Astraphobia, Baking, Brotherly Bonding, Brotherly Love, But only non-con touching, Cat Magnet Purl-Hew, Cats, Characters Watching Disney Movies, Childhood Trauma, Comfort Food, Crying, Dad Neon J, Eloni Gets to be Big Bro, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotions boiling over, Father-Son Relationship, Fatherhood, Gen, Haym in a Ponytail, Hugs, I guess we're yelling now, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Just open the floodgates, Knock-Off Video Game Titles, Lost Pet, Lullabies, Men Crying, Neon J is Legit Best Dad Ever, Nothing too serious nor graphic I promise, Other, Panic Attacks, Phobias, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rin's there too I guess lol, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues, Sleepy Cuddles, Tags Are Hard, We Don't Want to Get Sued, Zimelu likes to Bake, crazy fans, delved kinda deep into the philosophies of being an android huh, rabid fans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:41:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 19,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27495142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kanokko/pseuds/Kanokko
Summary: Eloni has always been sensitive, growing up the crybaby of the family. With age, however, comes maturity, if not quite from Eloni, then from his brothers.A series of one-shots featuring 1010 comforting one of their own. AKA 1010 taking turns being Best Big Brother.
Relationships: 1010 & 1010 (No Straight Roads), 1010 & Neon J. (No Straight Roads), Eloni & Haym (No Straight Roads), Eloni & Purl-Hew (No Straight Roads), Eloni & Rin (No Straight Roads), Eloni & Zimelu (No Straight Roads)
Comments: 42
Kudos: 153





	1. Especially For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My first fic in quite a while! I hope I'm right in saying my style has improved in that time, even if just by a lil bit. This work features a bunch of my headcanons for 1010, but nothing you won't get with context.

Eloni hated Wednesdays. Specifically, he hated the second Wednesday of every month. That’s when the fanmail came in. An NSR delivery van would come by and drop anywhere from a couple to a couple dozen boxes’ worth of letters, packages, and gifts. One of the mansion’s service bots would then deliver all the fully-loaded boxes to the living room, where 1010 and Neon J would spend the afternoon sifting through them. It was a small family tradition of sorts that most of the brothers enjoyed. Why wouldn’t they? Most of the letters were sweet, some were touching, some were genuinely funny, a number were inappropriate, and all of them were a massive ego-boost. Not to Eloni.

He would be lucky to receive a few hastily scribbled notes next to the others’ fifty letters each. While he was genuinely happy that his brothers were getting so much love and support, it was hard not to let the comparison get to him, especially after so many years. If anything, the number of letters he’d been getting had decreased since the revolution, what with all the other artists popping up to power the Qwasa. Usually, his brothers and father would be considerate and not rub the disparity in his face, making sure to offer light words of support and affirmation instead. Still, Eloni’s self-esteem suffered greatly.

Today was a different Wednesday, a quiet one as the boxes sat untouched in the living room. Neon J had taken Rin, Haym, and Purl-Hew to a panel in the Akusuka district, leaving only Eloni and Zimelu in the mansion. The green-haired android was sprawled out on one of the living room couches alone, having been watching funny animal videos on his phone and contemplating whether or not he should open the boxes without the rest of his family. Eventually, his impatience got the better of him and he stood from the comfort of his spot. There were only fourteen boxes today, an amount his android hands and processing systems could easily go through in half an hour, and go through them he did.

He shuffled through envelope after envelope after box after envelope, scanning the addresses and looking for his name or a splash of green. He went through box after box, neatly returning every package where he found it so his brothers could enjoy going through them themselves. Someone had been kind enough to send a whole jerry can of motor oil to Haym. Still, it was all a mish-mash of white, yellow, blue, and red ink and paper. Eventually, Eloni found himself sorting through the contents of the last box.

“Rin, Haym, Zimelu,” he muttered as his pace sped up, “Haym, Purl-Hew, Rin, Purl-Hew, Zimelu, Haym, Rin, Rin, _Pearl-Hue_ , Zim-Zim, Rin, Rin, Rin, Rin, Rin—ugh!” No green, no “Eloni” on any of the envelopes. The android scoffed loudly before haphazardly tossing the letters back into their box and marching to his room, his heavy metallic feet hitting the floor extra hard.

“This blows,” he said to no one in particular as he moved. Even on a slow day, he would get at least one letter, but zero? Eloni could feel the fans whirring and the circuits rushing inside of him, telltale signs of digital frustration building. “I can be just as cool, just as funny as the rest of them. We all look alike, so I couldn’t possibly be _that_ bad-looking. Hell, we all literally sound _exactly the same!_ ” He gave some semblance of a growl. 

When he finally reached his room, he slammed the door behind him. The force was great enough to rattle the potted plants on his shelves. He ignored all of them and threw himself more onto his bed facefirst. He gripped one of his fat, fluffy pillows to his chest and face, burying himself in it. As an android, he didn’t really need to breathe, but stuffing his face into his pillow gave him some sense of suffocation. It was a good kind of suffocation, one that seemed to draw his frustrations out with the air. 

He screamed into his pillow. The sound scraped against the inside of his throat, but he screamed again. Then again. Before he knew it, he was having his own muffled yet guttural concert in the confines of his bed. He didn’t know why this felt different. It wasn’t the first time he got absolutely zilch, so why was he boiling over now? Was it because everyone else was gone so he finally felt like he could genuinely react? Maybe they were just having trouble adjusting to such emotions after their teenage update. After a few minutes, his screams dissolved into grunts, which eventually turned into bouts of heaving.

“I just don’t get it. What am I doing wrong?” Eloni pulled his face from his pillow and shifted into a fetal position, still clutching the pillow tightly. The pillow, he noticed belatedly, was stained where his face was moments ago. He was crying again. It was hard to notice the tears through the rawness of his throat.

“Damn it,” he cursed. He didn’t like crying. Growing up, he was always the crybaby. He would cry every time Haym teased him or Zimelu shoved him. He would cry half the time when Neon J scolded him. The gigantic crybaby with a gigantic, goofy onion ring on his head. He cursed himself again. He hated this. After getting into NSR, he promised himself he would stop crying so much. He was supposed to be mature now, tough, a celebrity. Plus it would probably be a bad look if any paparazzi caught him bawling his optics out.

Still, now that some of the frustration had faded away, the android couldn’t stop the tears from flowing down the side of his face. His breath hitched every so often, settling into a rhythm with his breathing. It was painful. A pain that sat somewhere between physical and incorporeal. A pain that existed only in the code that made up his brain, “existing” but still managing to fry his processors. A pain he couldn’t fully comprehend. His pillow must have been soaked through by now.

A soft rapping on the door broke his reverie. “Go away, please,” Eloni said loud enough to be heard through the wood. 

“It’s Zimelu,” the android replied from outside. “Would you let me in, Eloni?”

“Eloni isn’t here.”

“ _Eloni_ just told me to go away, dummy. Just open the damn door.”

The green android huffed and pouted to himself, begrudgingly standing up to admit his brother. He wiped his tears as he walked, silently hoping that they didn't stain the metal of his face. When he got to the door, he half expected to find Zimelu, hands on his hips, about to yell at him for making so much noise. And for being a crybaby again.

It was surprising, then, when Eloni opened the door to find his brother, thick eyebrows furrowed, a worried expression on his face. “You okay in there, bro?” Zimelu asked.

“Mm-hmm,” Eloni managed to spit out. “I was just listening to some, uhh, some heavy metal. Yeah…”

“Right,” Zimelu replied, unconvinced. “And I was just listening to Sayu’s new single. You’ve been crying. Would you let me in now?”

Eloni’s gaze fell to the floor before he nodded in admission. The two brothers sat next to each other on Eloni’s bed, facing the window. The bustle of the Metro Division District was visible in the distance. Eloni unconsciously began hugging the pillow again.

“What’s up?” Zimelu asked. “I heard stomping and screaming from downstairs and I was like ‘damn, what’s that bonehead Zimelu up to this time?’ Then I remembered, _I’m Zimelu_.”

Eloni chuckled at that. Zimelu wasn’t often one to joke, but he was funny when he tried. “It’s nothing, I just went through the letters early.”

“And?” Zimelu’s eyebrow arched upward.

After some hesitation, Eloni replied. “And I was, y’know, hoping.”

“For?”

“Letters.”

“To?”

“Letters to me.”

“Uh, what for?”

“So I could—” Eloni shook his head and huffed. “Zim, are you serious right now?” This wasn’t funny anymore. His brother could not be this dense.

The red-haired android put his hands up defensively. “Yes? I’m pretty sure I am! Could you please just tell me what’s going on? You’re scaring me and it’s making me uncomfortable.”

Eloni sighed. This dumb, well-meaning bitch. “It’s the letters, Zim. I got none this time. Not even a single sticky note from a fan. And I know, not surprising, not the first time, yeah. But, I don’t know, it got to me this time." Eloni exasperatedly threw is hands up in the air. "I hate that you have to see me like this right now, but it sucks, man. It really fucking sucks. I have no idea what I’m doing wrong that fans don’t see me. Even with the system upgrade, I feel like I need their support and admiration to keep running. Like I can’t do anything right without it. Which is weird, right? We’re literally programmed to sing on key and dance on beat every time, but it’s just been gnawing at my wires for so long… I don’t know what to do. I-I don’t know how to handle these feelings.”

Eloni didn't realize how much he said until a few seconds after he stopped. He didn't usually ramble like this. It felt like opening a floodgate. The whole time, his voice hiccuped and glitched. His crying and screaming must have messed with his vocal systems.

Zimelu only watched silently, nodding every so often. “Honestly, bro?” He finally spoke. “Neither do I. We’re all kinda new to this, I guess. Trust me, I can relate to being out of control with your feelings. And screaming. I just never thought those letters got to you that much.”

Eloni squinted briefly at that and was about to say something before Zimelu continued.

“What I mean is, why do they matter? Those fans? Sure, we kind of need them if we still wanna have a career, but they don’t know you. Not like me or Dad or the others. They don’t see how hard you try or how much of a trooper you are, right?” He paused for a minute, thinking of what to say next. Eloni’s breath stopped hitching. “I don’t know, maybe it’s just not something I get as much. Maybe I’m just not like you or Rin or the others and I know I’m the shit and don’t need no fans to be sure. Or I don’t know, I just don’t get what you’re going through specifically, ‘Loni. I’m sorry. I wish I could say more.”

Zimelu's own speech was equally surprising. Eloni didn't think he'd ever heard his brother speak so sincerely to him. “No, Zimelu,” Eloni said meekly. “You’ve already said a lot. I appreciate it, all of it.”

“Yeah, um…” Zimelu shifted, his arms coming up for a second before jerking back in hesitation. On instinct, Eloni leaned back to avoid what he thought was a shove. After that brief and awkward moment, the red android finally pulled his brother into a hug. “I know my hugs suck, but you need one right now.”

“Zim...” If Eloni was surprised earlier, he was shocked now. Zimelu had hugged them before, of course, but hardly ever as intimately and genuinely as this. Eloni wrapped his arms around his brother, too. As they held the hug in silence, they could feel each other’s faint internal whirs and hums through the contact. Eloni could feel another batch of tears rising to his optics, but they didn’t come out.

Zimelu broke away from the hug but kept his hands on Eloni’s shoulders. His usual sharp-toothed smile was back on his face. “I know I suck at giving words of comfort or encouragement or whatever, but trust, I am an expert on how to cheer up my baby bro.”

Minutes later, both brothers were in the mansion’s kitchen. The place was needlessly fancy and huge, with every kind of kitchen appliance one could think of, and a sprawling island counter. 1010 didn’t really need to eat food. They could, but none of them had to worry about traditional starvation. Neon J was the only one who actually needed to use the kitchen, but he was always busy, preferring to have one of the mansion’s robots fix something up or to have food delivered. The kitchen couldn’t even collect dust with the maintenance bots around. 

Eloni sat at the island, his legs swinging instinctively underneath the bar stool. He watched as his brother made a mess of the kitchen. The marble countertop was currently covered in sugar, egg shells, and batter. Clouds of flour puffed in the air occasionally.

“So listen,” Zimelu said, his back to Eloni as he whisked a bowl of frothy white mixture. “Last week, Haym showed me this mom vlogger or something and she runs this baking channel on WeTube. I don’t know what Haym was doing on a mom vlogger’s channel, but she did this cool thing with the icing. I think the grated _tubo_ was supposed to thicken it, plus it tastes awesome, too.”

Eloni gladly listened to every word of his brother’s story. If neither of them could process his feelings at the moment, then the lighthearted distraction was more than welcome, not that it was particularly needed. The prospect of a freshly baked, homemade doughnut was mouth-watering enough already.

Zimelu always had a special recipe for baking doughnuts, one he used for Eloni whenever he had a sad or special day. Because, as Zimelu had put it when they were 12, “I think of you whenever I see a doughnut, so Imma make a special one just for you!” And so the Elonut was born. The pastries used to be salty and hard, even for metal android teeth. Eloni still loved them, though. In part due to a less developed gustatory program, but mostly because Zimelu had made them for him.

Here they were, on another sad day that warranted doughnuts. Zimelu had certainly improved his baking skills, which was fortunate for their now acute taste senses, but his cleanliness seemed stuck in his preteens. After recounting memories of making the dessert with Zimelu, Eloni found his electronic mind wandering, ruminating further on his relationship with his brother. 

Even when the Elonuts came into existence, they were only short reprieves from Zimelu pushing Eloni around, both literally and figuratively. Zimelu had liked to pick on him so frequently specifically because he was a crybaby. What had changed since then, he didn’t know for certain. Eloni suspected the anger management sessions Neon J had uploaded into Zimelu’s system were to blame, but perhaps that was taking away too much credit from his brother. He could simply be maturing like the rest of them, like Eloni needed to do.

Before Eloni could think too much about it, he was snapped back to reality by the aroma of the warm pastry wafting into his system. 

“Here you go, buddy,” Zimelu said, pushing a plate of half a dozen doughnuts in front of him. “A batch of specialty Elonuts, on the house.” 

Eloni could feel a wide, probably-stupid looking grin on his face. It pushed down the tears in his optics. Without a word, the green-haired android plucked a doughnut from the plate and shoved it whole into his mouth, picking up one more in each hand to wait their turn.

Eloni slumped in his chair, melting into the familiar, delicious taste. “These taste _so good_ , Zim,” he said with his mouth full of doughnut. After swallowing, he continued. “You were right though, the _tubo_ does give it some kick. I love it!” He took another hefty bite from a doughnut.

“I’m glad I could make them for you again, ‘Loni.” Zimelu leaned against the counter, watching his youngest brother stuff himself happy. It was a silly sight, but Zimelu was relieved to see his brother out of that rut. He smiled, only slightly so Eloni wouldn’t notice.

As for Eloni, the feelings and the struggle were still there, sitting somewhere amongst the circuitry. In the meantime though, he was more than grateful to have his brother and doughnuts.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapters may or may not be continuous chronologically. I'm using this work as a sort of characterization exercise, as well as establishing relationships among the boys. I do plan to do at least the other 3 as well tho!!


	2. Cat Magnet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brothers may not always make the best decisions, but they always pull through in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Partly inspired by this awesome piece of art: https://seapuun.tumblr.com/post/629617182076190720/nsr-discord-peeps-had-a-headcanon-about

“Scraggy!”

“Pspspspspspspsps.”

Eloni and Purl-Hew called out as they stalked through the streets of the Metro Division District. The other week, Eloni had found and adopted an old stray cat after a concert and decided to adopt it behind Neon J’s back. It was his first actual pet, which he lovingly named Scraggy. Luckily for him, the cat was a lazy thing, probably having grown weary with age, preferring to laze in one of Barraca Mansion’s endless rooms. Eloni felt safe knowing that he could come home after a concert or an interview and find his pet right where he left it, sleeping soundly. Today, however, the cat was nowhere to be found when the boys arrived home from a press conference.

So, here he was with his brother, trudging through an alleyway incognito, making weird noises in the hopes of summoning a thin, bony cat. Fortunately, it was drizzling in the city today, so most of their fans would probably be at home or indoors. Nevertheless, the boys took precaution, donning civilian disguises to avoid getting mobbed. Eloni was in his second favorite hoodie, a baggy, black and neon pink cyberpunk-looking thing that was big enough to mask his frame and his face. His hair ring was down and tied into a knot on the back of his head.

Purl-Hew, on the other hand, looked like he was about to pull a gun on you, which was technically always true with their built-in hand blasters. The blue-haired android was in a deep purple hoodie, with bigger than usual shades and a mask over the bottom half of his face. Eloni had begged his brother to come help him search as cats had this odd magnetism towards him. It would hopefully prove useful today.

“Pspspspspspspsspsps!” Eloni tried calling for Scraggy again.

“Dude,” Purl-Hew scoffed behind his mask. “Are you even sure we’re heading in the right direction?”

“Positive! I remember finding him on Cuprum Avenue, right next to the hardware store.” Said store was already in view from the mouth of the alleyway. Eloni gestured to it while he spoke. That would be the fifth place the pair had searched through that afternoon.

“What makes you think he’d come back here, though?”

“He was living in a box when I found him. It was his house, or something. Maybe he missed it, I don’t know!” Not waiting for his brother, Eloni trekked over to the hardware store, turning behind the building into a smaller alley. In the alleyway sat a single dumpster, a stack of dilapidated crates, and a bunch of wooden planks. Eloni carefully and deliberately pushed aside some of the crates, revealing a wet cardboard box behind them. “See!” He exclaimed to Purl-Hew.

“Yep, I do see,” Purl-Hew said flatly. “It’s a soggy old box. Zero cats.”

“I mean the house I was talking about,” Eloni groaned, putting a hand to his face. “Anyway, let’s keep looking.”

Purl-Hew scanned the area briefly with his infrared vision. Although his senses picked up no sign of a cat, Eloni insisted that they conduct a search anyway. The brothers swept the entire back alley, checking each crate and every little nook they could find. Eloni even rummaged through the dumpster, while Purl-Hew disgustedly refused to help. He did help boost his brother up so they could survey the rooftops, to no avail. Eloni was slowly growing more distress for the safety of his pet, the light rain beginning to seep into his clothes. It was probably the closest thing to a cold sweat that his android body could experience. 

Determined and concerned, the youngest 1010 member insisted to keep up the search despite his older brother's groaning. After looking around the hardware store, the pair crossed the street to scope out the surroundings of an apartment complex, then a playground, then a hoverboard park, then, finally, a small diner. “Why would it possibly be here, Eloni?” Purl-Hew inquired incredulously. “This place is like nine blocks from that droopy rectangle it called home.”

“ _ He  _ used to be fed here,” Eloni corrected. The two of them walked towards the quaint building. Despite its size, it stuck out like a sore thumb in the district. Its rustic brick exterior, earthy colors, and warm lighting contrasted against the sleek, neon backdrop of the Metro Division. On the front of the diner hung a hand-painted sign that read,  _ Mom & Mama’s _ . “The owners used to leave out leftovers for the alley cats, including Scraggy. They’re really nice.”

“I didn’t even know they still had places like this in the district,” Purl-Hew commented. He stopped at the foot of the stairs leading to the entrance, tilting his glasses downward to survey the establishment. “Hmm, vintage,” he remarked. “Anyway, mind if we take a break inside?” Purl-Hew’s robotic joints were starting to ache.

Eloni looked like he was about to say no, but he stopped himself, sighing and dropping his shoulders. “Okay.” The fatigue was likely catching up with him as well.

The interior of the diner was just as rustic as the outside. Lots of wood and ceramics. A cozy atmosphere permeated throughout the entire place. It wasn't necessarily Purl-Hew's style, but he could imagine why Eloni would gravitate towards it. Inside, there sat only one other patron, a middle-aged man reading a book. They probably didn’t have to worry about being recognized, then. The two androids took a seat at a booth by a window. The glass was misted over in the gloomy weather. “Finally,” Purl-Hew groaned, shrugging off his hood and mask. “This ugly-ass weather is ruining my hair. Nevermind all the friction from this cheap jacket.”

“I hope Scraggy is somewhere dry,” Eloni said, completely ignoring his brother's complaints. His gaze was fixated somewhere outside the window.

“Cats are smart. He’ll know how to find shelter, don’t worry." Purl-Hew picked up a menu and skimmed through it, annoyed that they seemed to serve only typical organic food. "What are you ordering?”

“I’m worried, Purl.” The blue-haired android sighed. He loved his brother, and hated seeing the usually sweet android look so dejected, but it had been an exhausting day already. A recording session in the morning, a brunch-out with fans, then a full press conference for their new album. And now, he had to be dragged along in the rain for nearly two hours to look for a cat that he already advised his brother not to take in. He just wanted to go home, take off this hideous disguise, and recharge.

“So am I,” Purl-Hew answered. “What’s Dad going to say when we come home from ‘babysitting’ drenched in rain with a cat in tow?”

“I don’t care. He can yell at me all he wants, I just want to find Scraggy.” Purl-Hew sighed again. He was accustomed to his younger brothers throwing fits like this and acting like babies. Eloni refused to meet his brother’s shaded eyes, even as a waitress approached to take their orders.

“I’ll just have some of your cooking fuel,” Purl-Hew smiled at the waitress, turning on the usual charm. “Unused, please.”

“Um, okay,” the waitress’ brows scrunched together in confusion. These weren’t her typical customers or orders. She turned to Eloni. “And for you?”

Eloni kept his gaze cast outside, propping up his head on one hand. Neon J or Rin probably would have scolded his bad manners if they had been there. “Doughnut," the green-haired android simply said, tone uncharacteristically flat.

“Alrighty, I’ll get right back to you.” The waitress scribbled on her notepad and turned away, remarkably peppy given the oddity.

“How about this, Eloni?” Purl-Hew started. “We’re a little over a block away from the Natura District, so how about we keep looking until the border and if we don’t find him by then, we can go home for the day. Dad has a meeting with Tatiana the whole day tomorrow, so all five of us can go out looking. We can cover more ground that way. That sound good?”

The green-haired android only grumbled in response. Purl-Hew assumed that was a no, then. He genuinely thought it was a good plan of action, but Eloni seemed set on finding his cat as soon as possible. It was an understandable compromise of logic, he guessed. On the street outside, more and more cars began speeding by, leaving wet mists in their wake. Minutes passed in silence. Eloni muttered, “God, I hope he’s safe.”

“Yeah,” Purl-Hew agreed, receiving their orders from the waitress. Purl-Hew shot her another smile, which she returned as she walked to serve the other table. He sipped on his glass of oil, the drink immediately lubricating his mechanical insides. That felt refreshing, distracting even. “The roads are pretty wet today. Hopefully he didn’t get mown down in the traffic.”

After a split second to process what he just said, Purl-Hew’s eyes widened. It was at this moment he knew he fucked up. He looked over at Eloni, whose eyes were even wider and painted in what looked like immense distress. His doughnut was in hand, halfway to his agape mouth. “Why would you say that?” Eloni said, voice cracking the slightest bit.

“No, wait, bro! I-I,” Purl-Hew tried to backtrack and come up with a reasonable excuse to assuage his brother’s growing worries. “I was just saying it was a possibility, not a likelihood. I mean, Metro Division is a really bustling district after all, right? If anything, really, Scraggy would’ve died of old age!”

“What?!” Eloni cried out. His robotic voice could be heard across the diner. Even with the scarce patronage, Purl-Hew was worried that they would cause a scene. The last thing they needed right now was to get mobbed by fans. Still, Eloni continued his hysterics. “Dude, I asked you to come with me to bring home my cat, not his dead body! I thought you would be helpful, or at least care! I know it’s been a long day, alright? You can head home if you want to, but I’m gonna keep looking til I find Scraggy." He huffed angrily and took a bite out of his doughnut. "I just want my friend back,” he said eventually.

Purl-Hew sat and stared in silence. It wasn’t often that he put his foot in his mouth like this. That was mostly Haym’s job. “I’m sorry, Eloni.” The older android managed a weak apology, unsure what else to say lest he make his brother feel even worse. Eloni was a sensitive one, but the was still quite tactless. The day's long activities must have fried Purl-Hew's sensible wires. Now, he could only purse his metallic lips and watch his brother quietly shed tears. His face was scrunched into a pout, eyebrows tightly furrowed, and arms crossed. He looked like a completely different android. Gone were his typical saccharine smile and familiar ring on his head. Instead, his messy bun looked like an unkempt bush. 

An imaginary lightbulb pinged to life inside Purl-Hew’s circuit brain. “I have an idea.”

* * *

The setting sun cast both a warm light and elaborate shadows on everything as Purl-Hew and Eloni walked through a narrow pathway in the Natura District. The path was lined with vibrant flowering bushes. When Purl-Hew suggested that they take a visit to the neighboring district, Eloni had begun to put up a fight, but soon begrudgingly went along.  They had made the brief walk to the outskirts of the district, entering a small park adjacent to a cluster of greenhouses and nurseries.

When the five of them were child androids, Neon J would take them to the parks in Natura if the weather was kind and the schedule was free. It was a gleeful experience for all of them. Rin adored the classical musicians playing here and there. Haym got to run around the not-fragile, not-expensive grass to his heart’s content. Zimelu enjoyed eating the not-fragile, not-expensive grass. And Neon J got to lounge around while keeping eyeless watch of his boys on his radar. What Purl-Hew and Eloni loved to do was explore the grounds, combing through the bushes and trees to find all manner of flower, fruit, insect, bird, and small mammal. The older android would scribble furiously in his little notebook, recording everything he could observe from the organisms. The younger one loved sketching the cute creatures in his pad. The duo would spend every afternoon in the park like a junior research team, sharing insights and giggling all the while. 

“Check it out, ‘Loni,” Purl-Hew said, back in the present. He pointed to a patch of small, leafy, green and purple plants. “Mimosas. Remember when I used to call you Mimosa? You used to look and act just like one.”

“Yeah,” Eloni smiled at the memory.

“Vibrantly colored, and uniquely shy for a plant, folding in on itself when touched. Regardless of how it sounds, that makes it remarkable and unique among the plant kingdom. Even if it doesn’t know it,” Purl-Hew smiled at his brother, hoping to lift his spirits and keep his mind off of his cat for a couple minutes more.

“Whatever you say, Purl,” Eloni rolled his eyes, but followed along anyway. Eventually, the pair reached one enclosed chamber among a row of identical ones. Its walls were lined from top to bottom with golden pots, each of which brimmed with leaves. It was a quiet, simple, and airy space. On another day, Eloni would have loved to draw here.

“Here we are!” Purl-Hew announced. 

“What is this place?” Eloni had never been to this particular spot, nor had he seen these particular plants before.

“This place is the answer to our problems.” Purl-Hew gingerly plucked a handful of leaves from a few of the plants, circling the chamber as he did. He collected them into one palm, placing two fingers from his other hand on top of the pile. "Hopefully this works.” Purl-Hew activated the blasters on his fingertips, firing them at the faintest possible setting. The heat continuously emanated from his fingers, roasting the leaves beneath them and filling the chamber with a cozy, intoxicating smell.  The android kept up his strange experiment while his brother watched in bewilderment. After about fifteen seconds, Eloni turned around and peeked outside the chamber, expecting to find something, anything. Just as he was about to ask his brother to explain himself, Eloni heard an abrupt “Ack!” followed by the sounds of mewling.

He turned around to find a thin, yellow and orange cat perched on his brother’s blue head. “SCRAGGY!”

Eloni jumped with utter enthusiasm, snatching the cat from Purl-Hew’s head as it swiped lazily at the leaves in his hand. He hugged his pet to his face. “Oh, I’m so happy you’re safe, Scraggy! Don’t ever do that again. At least leave a post-it on the fridge if you do, okay?” He tapped the cat on his nose.

His hair was now an even bigger mess than it already was, but Purl-Hew smiled contentedly, happy to have helped his brother and relieved to have made up for his fuck up. He discarded the burnt leaves onto the ground. “Hey, what is that, anyway?” Eloni asked, Scraggy still clawing at the air in the leaves' direction.

“Some new breed of catnip. I read an article about it the other day. I figured Scraggy might have made his way here if he was gonna go through all the trouble. If he wasn’t, then I could have just done the same thing all across town.” He would get mobbed by a bunch of alleycats for sure, but better cats than fans.

“You’re a genius, Purl!” Eloni exclaimed. “I totally owe you one. I love you so much right now.”

That made Purl-Hew feel a tug at his core. They didn’t often feel the need to share such sentimentalities with each other, but this hit differently. Before Purl-Hew could even reply, Eloni continued rambling affections to his cat. “And I love  _ you _ , you adorable little thing. When we get home, I’m gonna make you the softest little cat bed, and get you a collar, too!”

Neon J would probably scream at them the second they arrived at the mansion, but Purl-Hew didn’t want to break his brother’s high spirits, especially after today. He was willing to take all the blame if it meant keeping Eloni happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Funny note, I realized after writing this that the word I was looking for was "scraggly," cuz apparently scraggy is a pokemon. Kept it in tho cuz it was a similar color, cute!


	3. You're Perfect, You're Beautiful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y̶o̶u̶ ̶l̶o̶o̶k̶ ̶l̶i̶k̶e̶ ̶L̶i̶n̶d̶a̶ ̶E̶v̶a̶n̶g̶e̶l̶i̶s̶t̶a̶ Seriously though, Eloni finally gets to begin a deeper reconciliation with his struggles of self-worth with the brother that probably stokes them the most.

The limousine was quiet, save for the low whirring of engines and the lively sounds of the city passing by. Neon J sat firmly, scrolling through his tablet and reviewing the night’s performance, muttering every now and then. Purl-Hew was busy on his phone, probably updating his social media. Haym was passed out, nodding off to one side with Zimelu half-way there as well. It was a trying day for all of them. It was their last concert for the week, and every imaginable mishap decided to pile onto it.

When they arrived at the venue, the crew was all over the place. Half of them were frazzled and overworked, while the other half were apparently unaware that a show was being staged that day. They had the misfortune of seeing Neon J’s barking military side. 1010 ended up having to help compensate for the preparations, their robotic armaments streamlining the process. Because of that, the band lost precious minutes to style their hair which, for some, was eccentric to say the least. When the show was about to begin, there was a miscommunication of sorts, and two dozen or so audience members nearly lost their front row seats. The lights crew, however, weren’t familiar with their cues, and the sound was _way_ off balanced. Until now, Neon J was grumbling about leaving it to the professionals or something. 

Most of all, Eloni had flubbed his performance. The wonky stage setup was just the slightest bit too distracting, and he fell a beat behind on the choreography for a whole two verses. For a regular, human boy band, it probably wouldn’t have been noticeable, but they were androids. Their movements were precise and synchronized with each other to a tee. Even half a syncopated step was glaringly obvious. The attempt to correct his dancing made him go flat on a couple of notes, too. Neon J hadn’t said anything to him yet. His stress was arguably a lot greater than Eloni’s at the moment.

He still felt like shit, though. His chin rested droopily in one hand as he stared out the tinted glass. It was the end of the week and the Metro Division District was bustling with nightlife. Bright, neon lights made a mess of colors as the limousine dashed by, nearly drowning out all the young people having a night on the town. Next to Eloni, Rin sat as straight as an arrow, hands folded on his lap. At the moment, he was the only one who seemed to reflect the mood of their district. Eloni wondered how he always had the energy.

“Are you alright, Eloni?” The sound of Rin’s voice cut through the silence and surprised him a bit. Somehow, Rin seemed to lack a casual tone of voice in his systems. He always spoke in that theatrical, calculated voice that they used onstage. It usually served to lift Eloni’s spirits, especially when his other brothers were being impatient with him. Right now, though, it was a bit grating.

“M’fine,” he muttered. “Just a bit spent is all.”

“Ah, not to worry, then. We’re almost home. You’ll be able to recharge soon enough. You deserve it.” Rin gave Eloni that smile of his, head tilted to one side and all.

Eloni simply sighed and turned back to the window. “Sure.”

Hopefully, that punctuated the conversation for now. Eloni would normally love to talk with Rin, but he just wasn’t in the mood. A couple more minutes passed in silence, and when Eloni thought Rin was content to leave him alone, he spoke again. “You really did do very well today. It was actually a pretty good show, all things considered.”

Eloni wiped a hand across his face and straightened in his seat. He could tell Rin meant well, but the platitudes weren’t being received as well as intended. In a hushed tone, he turned to his brother. “Rin, you really don’t have to do this. I’m fine.”

“I know, I know. I’m just telling you the truth. You did just fine. I’m sure the fans loved your performance as much as they always do. I can’t wait to read all about their sentiments and stories in their letters next week. It was a really hectic show for everyone, after all. In fact, we’ll probably be seeing a fancam later tonight,” he said lightheartedly.

Okay, this was getting annoying. The last thing needed to hear was Rin talking about their fans. On fanmail Wednesdays, he easily got the highest number of letters and gifts. His sentiments were coming across as a bit tone deaf and made Eloni feel worse. Of course, he had to bring up the possibility of his blunder being recorded and immortalized in a fancam, too. “I wouldn’t know, Rin. We all can’t be as celebrated as you.”

Rin was about to say something but stopped himself. That last comment hit him straight out of left field, especially coming from his typically sweet youngest brother. Even Purl-Hew looked up from his phone upon hearing the remark. He only arched his eyebrow at Rin when their eyes met. Eloni ignored both of them, positioning his body to face the window as well. He just wanted this day, this entire week to end.

The rest of the ride home was silent. Eloni was thankful for it, but all the while, Rin’s circuit mind was running, tempting him to say something and make his brother feel better, but falling short every time. When they finally arrived at the mansion, Eloni practically leapt out of the limousine and made a wordless beeline inside. He didn’t even wait for Neon J to begin dismissing them for the night. To be fair, the equally exhausted cyborg probably didn’t notice him leave either.

As they made their own way to the mansion, Haym whispered to Rin, “What’s up with ‘Loni? You two fight or something?”

Rin pressed his metallic lips together. He had to fix this.

* * *

Sometime into the evening, Rin found himself in front of the door to Eloni’s room. He expected to find his brother charging peacefully inside or maybe with some music turned on. Before he even entered, he was somewhat dumbfounded. From his side of the door, he could hear the muffled sounds of his brother’s slightly autotuned crying. The white-haired android gripped the small pouch he brought with him, hesitating every time he heard a frustrated growl or sob.

In the middle of rehearsing what he’d say for the eleventh time, the sounds suddenly stopped. Rin’s fans whirred anxiously. A handful of scenarios ran through his head. Did Eloni hurt himself? Did he sneak out the window? Was he screaming into a pillow? No, he wasn’t violent enough to do that. Rin hoped he just tired himself out and fell asleep. He was about to knock on the door when it opened just a little in front of him.

“Oh, hey, bro,” Eloni said, voice still a little raw, but much less pointed than he expected. His hair ring was tied down into a messy bun on top of his head. Rin’s abrupt worries were relieved seeing his brother unhurt. “You need something?”

Rin swallowed and cleared his mechanical throat. “Yes, actually. I wanted to speak with you. May I please come in?”

Eloni nodded meekly and with little hesitation. It seemed like he expected Rin to come by. The older android nodded in return and stepped inside. Eloni wasn’t the neatest of his brothers, but his room was still a relative mess. His sheets and pillows were strewn about his bed, with his pet cat snoring among them. On the floor, several potted plants were placed beside the bed, along with a single green cardboard box. Rin took a seat on the desk chair by the wall, while Eloni resumed his position on the floor among his things. He sat hugging his knees to his chest.

When it was clear that Eloni wasn’t going to start the conversation, Rin finally spoke. “Eloni, about earlier,” Rin put mental effort to keep his voice low and as authentic as he could sound. He had talked to Purl-Hew earlier that evening to try and understand what had happened better. That was one of his tips, to not use ‘that daytime telecaster voice’ of his. “I wanted to apologize. It was a tiring day for all of us and I… No, I shouldn’t be making excuses.I wasn’t being considerate of your feelings. If anything, I was trying to make myself feel better after today’s stuff. I didn’t mean to undermine your feelings.”

Eloni nodded along silently until Rin finished, narrowing his eyes at his brother. “Do you even know what feelings you’re talking about?”

The truth was, he didn’t. Not fully. Rin pursed his lips again, not answering and opting to look at the floor instead. “Yeah, I thought so,” Eloni said. “Rin, I know you and I know you didn’t mean any harm. But lately, it’s been getting harder for me. Ever since that revolution, everything’s been changing so quickly and it’s a lot to process and I was hoping that things would get better for me but they’re not, okay? They’re not.”

Before Rin could even ask for a further explanation, Eloni cut him off and continued his rant. “See that?” He pointed to the box in front of him. Inside was a pile of envelopes and papers, some boxes as well. The contents barely filled up the container. “That’s everything I’ve ever gotten from fans in the past two years.”

“Oh,” was all Rin could manage. Realization dawned on him. He had boxes like that in his room, too. A whole closet dedicated to and filled with cardboard cubes full of adoring letters, artwork, and a slew of other gifts from fans. All of them addressed to Rin. He was aware, of course, that Eloni never got the most items, but imagining his one box next to his entire closet made him feel like his core processor would drop out of his chest. He felt stupid for not putting two and two together. He felt like a total jackass thinking that their shallow platitudes would be enough to make Eloni feel as validated as they did. 

“Yeah, I know,” Eloni spat. “Pitiful, right?”

Rin carefully stood from his chair, arms in front of him, ready to approach and console his brother. “No, Eloni, not at—”

“Then what, Rin?” Eloni cried. The sound was somewhere between a yell and a sob. Strangely, his voice was somewhat digitized, similar to their autotuned harmonies. Rin had never seen that happen before. He took a step back. “If it’s not pitiful, what is it? Do you think I deserve this? That I don’t deserve the mountains of letters, all the love, all the long lines that you guys get? Is that it?” Eloni didn’t realize it, but he was standing now. “You’re the leader, right? Daddy’s perfect little tinman? Then tell me what I’m doing wrong. Tell me where I’m lacking, where I’m fucking up and I’ll fix it. I’ll shut off my sleep cycle if it means I get better. I’ll try my…” He trailed off, before grabbing his head in frustration. “Argh! I’m _already_ trying my hardest! I really am, Rin. I love what we do so much, and I just don’t-just don’t understand why I’m not loved…” 

Eloni dropped onto the edge of his bed. His cat must have sensed his distress because he curled up against the android and nudged him with his head. ”Please, Rin. I need your help. I don’t know what to do with all of these feelings. They’re all so messy and painful and I don’t want to deal with them anymore. I have no idea what…”

Whatever Eloni was about to say, his tears cut him off. His head hung from his neck facing the floor, letting the tears drip like rain. His body seized every few seconds as he cried. Not wanting to approach his vulnerable brother yet, Rin stood where he was. At the very least he now knew where to start.

“It’s hard,” he said. “Trust me, I get it. And I’m not trying to undermine what you’re feeling again,” he quickly caught himself. “It’s just, sometimes, you wonder why Dad decided to put all of these thoughts, these emotions in our systems, right? What’s the point if they hurt so much and dull the effectiveness of our decision-making? It’s in no way a practical feature. At least, that’s what I think sometimes, during those nights kind of like this one, when I lie awake in my room the whole night trying and trying to...to dissect these feelings.”

Rin finally decided to settle on the floor a couple of feet in front of his brother, looking at the walls and the ceiling as he continued. “But you know, I don’t think I would ever trade them away. Not so I could have whatever semblance of bliss that would give me. I had asked Dad about this exact thing before, actually. I asked him if he could take the program out because I couldn’t take it anymore.”

Eloni looked up at that. “You did? What happened?”

“Well, obviously, I didn’t push through. Dad told me something that changed the way I looked at everything. He talked me off of the ledge, so to speak. He told me that he wanted us to feel genuine happiness, to experience actual, personal fulfillment in our existence. And that we wouldn’t ever truly know the good stuff without the bad stuff. The highs without the lows, or something he said. It’s hard to wrap your head around, I’m sure. I still don’t think I fully get it myself. In the end, though, he said all of it is what makes us—”

“Human?” Eloni supplied. His heaving and crying stopped, but his face was still dripping wet with tears.

“Androids, technically. But yes, for all intents and purposes, that’s what Dad wants us to be. That’s what he sees us as. Humans. And he wouldn’t want to take that away from us.” It was clear on Eloni’s face that the gears were turning in his head, trying to unpack all of what was just told.

“Uh, wow,” Eloni sniffled. “Sorry, that was a lot. And, uh, sorry, for being such a mess. And for yelling at you. I fucked up real bad in the show today, and I guess with everything piling up so quickly, it just sent me over the edge.”

“Oh?” That, Rin didn’t know. “I didn’t notice. Genuinely.”

“Yeah, it was in _Ship With You_. I fell behind on the choreo, went flat a couple times. It was messy.”

Rin was about to ask if that was it, but realized the insensitivity and aborted. “Really? Me too!” He laughed, hoping it was the right thing to say.

“Seriously? You?”

“Mm-hmm! I accidentally started the pas de bourree in the bridge with my right foot, not my left. It frazzled me a bit and I bumped into Zimelu.” It pained him to admit it so gleefully, but he needed Eloni to know his shortcoming didn’t mean the end of the world by a long shot. Rin should know.

“I didn’t notice at all,” Eloni breathed. “And the fans still cheered so loudly.”

“That’s what I’m telling you, nobody would mind a small boo-boo like that. You had fun out there and gave it your best, I know for sure.”

“Thank you, Rin.” Eloni finally cracked a small but genuine smile. “I know what I said earlier, but I really do look up to you so much. It’s moments like this that remind me why.”

“If I’m being honest, I’m still in the same boat as you are, as all of you are,” Rin replied. He knew all of his brothers looked to him as the eldest. He was designated by Neon J as the leader, after all. Although he was technically the oldest, the first built out of the five of them, they were all programmed to be the same age. Quintuplets, basically. So Rin often wondered why they looked at him this way. Nevertheless, he wouldn’t ever let himself fall short in helping his brothers when they needed him. He could fuck up all the choreography in the world and sing every note flat, but he wouldn’t fail his family.

“Eloni,” Rin began, looking at his brother squarely in the optics. “You are enough.” For some reason, that made Eloni’s brows furrow. “I know we don’t tell you this nearly enough, but you are genuinely perfect just the way you are. You do everything you love with so much passion, even off-stage. I see it, we all see it. Sure, it’s a learning curve, trying to separate the fan’s love from our self-esteem. I mean, it did literally make us detonate once. The point is, don’t let what they give you or don’t give you define you. At the end of the day, it’s only a persona they’re looking at. They don’t know the Eloni that takes in stray cats and cares for them like his kids. They don’t see the Eloni that talks to his plants when the weather is overcast to cheer them up. They don’t see the Eloni that paints Purl-Hew when he thinks his outfit is nice, or tries to bake for Zimelu even if he can’t do it nearly as well, or tags along with Haym at unholy hours of the night just to keep his fiery curiosity alive. They don’t see how you take the time to sing with me even if everyone else thinks it’s cheesy, or how you keep herbs in the garden specifically for Dad’s tea. No amount of fan letters will ever blind us to that, ‘Loni. We love you so much.”

That was enough to get Eloni crying again. He set his cat to his side and practically leapt at Rin, hugging him tight. Rin was caught off-guard, and a little off-balance but he caught them both. “Thank you,” the younger one whispered.

“Hey,” Rin said, breaking the hug. “I actually got you something to cheer you up.” He pulled the pouch from behind him. He retrieved the contents from the little bag and showed them off to Eloni.

“Aw! Disney movies!” Eloni squealed. “And you got the straight-to-DVD ones, too! Man, this is gonna be such a throwback.”

“Yup, I was thinking we could watch them together. We haven’t done that in a while.”

After Eloni collected himself, the pair collected a heap of blankets and pillows and dumped them in the living room. Rin hoped that the rest of their family was sleeping very soundly, because as it currently stood, he and Eloni were singing up a storm, flat notes and all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I did end up making the chapters chronological! I think this one is one of my longer ones so far, but there's a lot to unpack so I hope I did these boys justice. Also I don't own anything Disney pls don't sue ksjdklks


	4. Anytime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being a megastar comes with its own crosses to bear, as Eloni learns. That doesn't mean he has to bear them alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Though there isn't anything explicit, there's a lot of talk about non-consensual touching and how it makes (different) people feel. If that's something that makes you uncomfortable, please proceed to another chapter.

"'Loni? What's up?" Haym rubbed his optics. He was a groggy, groaning mess as he hadn't gotten enough sleep yet. 1010 was on tour across cities, which was something they didn't do often. The crux of their music career was to supply energy to the Qwasa in Vinyl City specifically anyway. With more and more artists taking up that mantle, however, Neon J thought it might be a good idea to expand the band's reach and ensure a prosperous career. In theory, it was a good idea and Haym was as ecstatic as everyone else, but that was before he realized how much more draining it would be. For starters, hardly anyone suspected that the fans outside of Vinyl City would be as rabid. It took extra effort on the boys' part to fend off touchy fans with only portable security.

Haym had assumed everyone was as tuckered out as he was. He was proven wrong by the sight of his only younger brother in front of him. Unlike Haym, Eloni's hair was still held up in its usual ring shape. In fact, he was still partially in costume, only the tight pants and tank top. What was most surprising though was his tear-stricken face. "Eloni? What's wrong?" Haym asked, coming to his senses and realizing the sight in front of him.

"Can I sleep in your room tonight?" Eloni sputtered out. The 'rooms' they had were tight spaces each with only a bed, a mirror, and a cabinet. They were essentially glorified broom closets, though they were enough so that everyone had their own private space on their giant flying trailer. Still, Haym didn't think twice about letting his brother in.

"Sure," Haym stepped back and motioned for his brother to enter. Eloni whispered a small thank you before heading straight for Haym's bed, curling up on it facing the side against the wall. Haym glanced down the narrow hallway before closing the door and sitting on the bed next to his brother.

"Bro, are you alright? What's going on?" Haym tied his hair back in a ponytail. It seemed like it was going to be a rough night. Eloni stayed silent. "Bro?" As Haym was about to put his hand on Eloni's leg, the younger android jerked his limb away.

"Don't!" Eloni sounded panicked, but quickly came back down to his senses. "Sorry, I… don't want to be touched right now, Haym. Please."

"Okay," Haym smiled gently. He watched Eloni bury his face in one of his pillows. "Okay that's fair. So do you want me to uhhh, just sit here and watch you sleep or something?"

"Yes, please," his voice was still muffled as he peeked his big doll eyes from atop the pillow. Haym chuckled. He was half joking to lighten the mood when he said it, but was happy to oblige anyway.

The pair sat in silence for a good long while, listening to only each other's mechanical breathing and rocking to the occasional swaying of the trailer. Haym tapped his fingers on his metallic leg to have something to pay attention to. It was a quick but quiet rhythm, one that wouldn't keep Eloni awake. Every so often, Haym would glance over at his brother's face and see he wasn't any closer to falling asleep than earlier.

When it was clear he was going to stay up for the rest of the night, Haym decided to ask again. "Hey, Bud. Are you ready to talk to me now?" He consciously kept his voice soft and gentle.

"Mm-hmm," Eloni hummed in a shaky robotic voice. He sat upright in the bed, still hugging the pillow and resting his head on top of it.

"Alright, I'm all ears, bro." Haym put his hands behind his ears for added effect.

"Haym, how do you deal with all the fans?" Eloni struggled to choose his words, sounding unsure as he finished his question.

"What do you mean?" Haym was aware that Eloni had been having self-esteem issues related to the amount of fanmail he had and stuff. He had mustered up the courage to ask Neon J if they could reangle his persona to make him more authentic and more relatable to fans at the same time. It seemed connected in Haym's mind, but he wanted to be sure.

"I mean when we have concerts or meets or those kinds of things, and there'd be tons of people screaming at you, a lot of them yell at you with some really nasty things."

"I know right?" Haym scratched the back of his head. "I mean, why go to a fan meet if you were gonna curse your idols out?"

"No, Haym," Eloni put the pillow away from his face, sighing and steeling himself. "I mean inappropriate like lewd stuff. Kinky, horny stuff. It doesn't faze you?"

"Ah." So that's what this was about. "Well, 'Loni, yeah. It does. I don't know how I _should_ feel about it, but I guess I kinda got used to it. After a while, the words just kinda blend together and you're not able to hone in on anything anyway. In one ear, straight out the other." Haym made an airplane-like motion into and out of the sides of his head. " _Zip_!"

If he was being completely honest, he thought a part of him actually liked that kind of attention, but something told him it wouldn't help Eloni to hear that right now. "Doesn't it make you feel weird?" The green-haired android continued. "Like, that other people are thinking about you doing all this crazy intimate stuff to them, and then then tell—no, yell it at you? In public?"

"Maybe sometimes." Haym cocked his head. It honestly depended on the person and how cute they were, but again, not what Eloni needed to hear. "I get what you mean, though. Kind of like having your personal space violated but in their minds, yeah?"

Eloni nodded. Haym took that as a sign to continue with whatever he was going to say. "Y'know, I remember when we were still noobs to the whole megastar thing. The first couple of months with NSR were awesome for me, for all of us. We weren't that popular yet but our fanbase kept growing and growing really fast. I remember being so excited to meet so many new people back when the fans weren't so rabid. There were a lot of genuinely sweet people out there who were great to talk to. I mean, there still are, of course. I just meant they're probably drowned out by the really loud ones. Not that being loud is bad, I mean it kinda gives us our shields and stuff. I meant the loud ones with not nice things to say. And there were more and more of them as the fanbase got bigger. I found it funny at first and I was like 'haha that's weird' but then it got obvious that a lot of people felt the same way and—"

Haym stopped himself. He forgot where he was going with this. "Sorry." He put a hand to his face. "I rambled again."

"No, no! It's fine Haym," Eloni shook his head. He chuckled a bit as he continued. "It's cute actually. I like listening to you. It helps me calm down."

Haym huffed and pouted at the notion of his only younger brother calling him cute, but he decided to keep talking and hopefully help Eloni feel better. "Okay, yeah, anyway. I really clearly remember when all of that changed for me." Eloni nodded grimly now. He probably remembered that day, too. "It was at the unveiling of that new tech hub in the district. I remember Dad J telling us to go out into the crowd and be friendly and stuff, show the people around. Then that massive crowd of screaming fans showed up. I was with Rin and Purl. We weren't ready." Haym laughed to himself at that. "Purl lost his glasses and Rin lost a calf and a foot. It was the second time I lost my left arm ever. They weren't that hard to replace, sure, but security hasn't ever been that low since. Thank God."

Another wave of silence washed over them. They were both trying to process what Haym just said. He didn't like digging up these memories. Eloni felt a little guilty for bringing them up, but he was grateful for the support. "How did you deal with it?" The younger one managed. His voice was so soft and so low, the digital echo they usually had was nearly inaudible. He sounded almost human. 

“Well, I took a long, long, _long_ shower and probably single-handedly doubled the water bill in one night. Then I took all of those gross feelings and put them in a box that’s sitting deep inside my circuits somewhere. I only ever take it out to dump in some more feelings, or, you know, right now.” Haym shrugged. He spoke lightly of the situation, sounding as though he was talking about walking through some video game he just bought. Truthfully, his insides were shaking. If his foot hadn’t already been tapping instinctively, his nerves might have been more obvious.

“I’m sorry I made you think about it again,” Eloni said, moving the pillow off of his lap and to his side.

“Don’t worry about it, ‘Loni.” Haym put his hands up, shaking his head. “I wouldn’t talk about it in front of anybody, especially not some nosy interviewer. You though? Not only are you, like, my best friend, but you need to hear this so you know someone gets it. I’m sure all our brothers can tell you the same thing, but I’m glad you came to me.” Now that he thought about it, he wasn’t sure how exactly their other brothers would have accommodated Eloni. He wasn’t even sure how they dealt with these feelings on their own. It was a very personal, very heavy ordeal and Haym knew first hand how grappling with it made you a different person behind closed doors.

“I…” Eloni started shakily. “I’m glad to hear that, Haymie. I kind of…” He trailed off before pulling his hand from underneath the pillow. He held the appendage up between them, trembling as he did. Eloni was missing a finger. Another one was nearly pulled out of its socket, as was his whole wrist. The wiring was visible in the cracks of the joints.

“Oh my God, Eloni,” Haym gasped, leaning forward and unfolding his legs from underneath him. He motioned to touch his brother’s hand, but caught himself. Compared to losing entire limbs, Haym would’ve considered these injuries completely minor had they happened to him. Seeing them on Eloni made a whole plethora of emotions course through his circuits. He felt horror at the confirmation that his brother was hurt, anger at whoever did this to him, guilt, sadness, it was a whole rollercoaster. The only words he found to say were “I’m sorry.”

“Please, don’t be,” Eloni put his other hand up defensively. “I’m fine now, no pain or anything.”

“Are you sure you’re alright? Does Dad know? We need to get this fixed.” Haym didn’t want to overwhelm his brother but his mind was rushing with worry.

“Haymie,” Eloni put his good hand on Haym’s knee. “I’m fine now. I figured Dad was pretty stressed, too, so I decided that I’d have it fixed in the morning.”

Haym took a deep breath and smiled. “Okay. Do you need me to do anything?”

“It was nice to just have you here. Listening to you helped. It kind of put what I was feeling into words, if that makes sense. You’re good at words, even if you think you’re not.”

Haym laughed softly at that. “With word vomit, maybe.” Eloni laughed, too.

“I have one last request, though, if that’s alright with you?” Eloni’s brows furrowed together.

“Anything.”

“It sounds stupid and embarrassing, like we’re eight years old again.” Eloni shook his head. “But can I sleep here with you tonight?”

That didn’t seem stupid or embarrassing to Haym at all. “Of course, ‘Loni.” He moved to lie next to his brother, but Eloni stopped him and scooted away.

“Wait,” he said. “Let me take a shower first. I don’t want you to touch me like this. I feel…” He thought about what he wanted to say before settling on, “dirty.”

“Okay, okay, that’s fair. Take all the time you need, ‘kay?”

“Don’t worry I won’t double the water bill or anything.” They both laughed at that. They felt both of their core processors be relieved to hear some laughter. Haym watched wordlessly as Eloni got up from his bed and shuffled outside.

The yellow-haired android lay in his bed, waiting. He fidgeted with his digits, tapped his foot on the wall, braided a few strands of his bright hair. The silence was uncomfortable for him. The lurching of their vehicle every now and then was the only thing calming his nerves at this point. He didn’t want to pull out his phone and watch something. He didn’t want to pull the mood from his head and ruin things for Eloni.

As he made the faintest of shadow puppets on the wall with the dull glow of his hair and cheeks, Haym fought the urge to grapple with his feelings again. He truly was conflicted, and could never decide what he felt on the matter. It always depended on something. He did genuinely think it was funny sometimes. Other days, it made him feel disgusted with himself. On darker days, he would think he deserved it if he wanted to keep what he had. Every time that happened, Haym would shove the thoughts away, turn off his sleep cycle, and play video games all night. If it was really bad, he would don a disguise and sneak out of the mansion. He couldn't do that right now, obviously.

After fifteen minutes that felt like an hour for Haym, Eloni finally stepped through the door again. His hair was the slightest bit damp but tied loosely in a bun. He finally changed out of his costume and was wearing his watermelon-patterned pajamas. Haym was glad to see him look and feel cleaned up.

The younger android stepped onto the bed and over his brother, settling between him and the wall. Eloni curled up into his usual bean shape in his spot. “You feeling better?” Haym whispered.

Eloni hummed in response, his optics shut. His broken hand lay by his peaceful face, twitching slightly. Haym breathed a sigh of relief seeing his brother like this. He settled his head down onto his pillow, keeping it a little bit higher than Eloni’s. He lifted his arm, moving it above his brother. “Mind if I?”

The younger android cracked an optic open. “Yes, please.” Haym shifted closer to his brother and wrapped him in a hug. He wished they could be in the mansion for this. Rin had a closet full of stuffed animals that he thought everyone didn't know about. It would've been nice to raid it and surround themselves with the soft toys at the moment.

To Eloni, Haym already felt warm and tender despite the cold metal of their bodies. He couldn’t recall the last time he cuddled with any of his brothers. All five of them were really touchy when they were kids, but Eloni supposed that was something destined to fade away as they grew older, as they had their mechanical parts upgraded and their programs rewired. It had made him sad at first. Eloni loved hugs, and couldn’t sleep without clinging to one of his older brothers. Not to say they didn’t hug anymore, but adult hugs hit differently. Being wrapped up in Haym’s arms made him feel like a kid again. It was comforting to return to such times right now. He hugged his brother back.

“Thank you,” Eloni whispered. Haym could feel his brother's fans and gears and other mechanical parts begin to slow their pace. A telltale sign of his younger brother falling asleep. He deserved a nice long rest.

“No problem, ‘Loni.” Haym would still be here when he woke up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this was a bit heavy, I spoke from my own knowledge about the topic, and tried to keep it respectful. I just figured that this was a logical direction to go when exploring 1010's admittedly warped relationship with fans. I also hc that Haym and Eloni are the closest to each other :3
> 
> Also I'm tryna see something, do you read Haym like lime/rhyme or is it pronounced like game/flame? I read it like lime/rhyme, but idk about the rest of the fandom :0


	5. The Calm After the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even though Eloni has always been the youngest member of 1010, he still knows how to be a Big Bro, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since the last chapter might have veered too much into uncomfortable non-con territory, I decided to make this one. Consider it a bonus chapter, Haym pt. 2 if you will. 
> 
> This one was inspired by real life, as my community was recently hit by a really bad typhoon. It was pretty easy to translate my own anxieties because of it into this. That said, another slight TW unfortunately. This one for talk of phobias and some panic attacks.

Neon J had Barraca Mansion built with every reasonable defense in mind. Any would-be infiltrator had to get past seven layers of security before they could even think about touching him or his android sons. Even then, they were equipped with an arsenal of deadly weapons and a library of military tactics, perfectly capable of combat in their own right. They were, after all, originally built to be defense units for the city. Regardless, their creator-captain-manager-father had spared no expense in ensuring a safe abode. 

Right now, the mansion was protecting its inhabitants from an oncoming storm. Weather reports told of a powerful typhoon soon to hit Vinyl City, so Neon J had decided to cancel all concerts for the following week. He and his troops would probably survive such harsh weather, but not their fans. The worst of the storm hadn’t arrived yet, but the gales that preceded it were already hitting hard. From inside their game room, a green and a yellow android watched the trees in their yard whip around in the forceful winds. A few of the smaller bushes had already been uprooted.

“Gosh,” Eloni put a hand to his chin. His old cat was cradled in the other arm. “I don’t want to imagine how bad it’s gonna get in the next few days.” Purl-Hew had reassured them earlier that the city had built-in mechanisms to deal with storms and flooding, but it was still worrying. 

“I know, right?” Haym shuddered next to him, taking a small step back from the large pane of glass. “I really hope the people in the district stay safe.”

“Not just them,” Eloni added, stroking Scraggy on his back. “I’m so worried about all the stray animals in the city. They have no strong homes to protect them. At least I was able to rescue you, wasn’t I, Scraggy?” He nuzzled the cat on his nose.

Both androids and the cat yelped when a flying branch hit the window in front of them. “Gah!” Haym cried out. “Just close the damn curtains already! This whole thing is stressing me out!” He grumbled as he drew the ornate pieces of cloth over the window, blocking from view the tumultuous sights outside. After giving another exasperated huff, Haym trudged over to the main couch and threw himself on it, placing a pillow on his lap and grabbing a game controller from the coffee table.

Eloni followed suit in a calmer manner, sitting next to his brother and holding his cat. “Okay, Scraggy, I’m gonna put you down now, okay? We’re just gonna play a little game.” He set his pet gingerly down onto the carpet and reached for the other controller from the table, booting up their console. The colorful show that had just been on the screen disappeared, being replaced by an all-black screen with a pair of glowing letters growing in the middle.

“So what’s it gonna be, Haym?” Eloni asked, his tone playful. “Am I gonna whip you in Overcraft or in Portal Combat? Pick your poison.”

“Oh-ho-ho, brother,” Haym tutted. “The only whipping here is coming from me. Portal Combat, let’s go!”

“Best three out of five?” 

“Loser gets to style the other’s hair for the next fan meet.”

“You’re on.” It seemed like a steep condition, but Eloni was feeling confident. Although his brothers usually swept the floor with him at fighting games, he had been practicing. And asking Purl-Hew for battle strategies and tricks. He pulled up the game and chose his fighter, letting his brother do the same. Just as Eloni had predicted, Haym went for his usual main, a ranged assassin type, with a cybernetic eye and a bazooka. It wasn’t hard to see why Haym gravitated to him. Eloni chose this interesting character who was part bug or something. He loved bugs.

After Haym selected a stage to fight in, the announcer’s deep booming voice instructed them to begin the battle. The three rounds were a bit of a back-and-forth, but Eloni ultimately lost the first match. “Ha! What did I tell you?” Haym gloated merrily. Luckily for Eloni, he had been familiarizing himself with another character, a teleporting ninja and a perfect counter to his brother’s fighter. It was time to bust out his gaming moves.

The next battle went much quicker than Haym expected, with Eloni seemingly turning pro in between rounds. Haym couldn’t even win a single round this time. “Aw, what?!” He exclaimed upon losing. “Dude, when did you get so good at this game?”

“Whatever, bro,” Eloni shot back. “Just admit you suck and we can get on with it.”

“In your digital dreams!” The pair dove back into battle, getting extra animated with their controls, standing up on the couch during tense moments and lurching to the side when they made their character doge. They were yelling quite loudly, too, which irritated Scraggy. Purl-Hew came in at one point to see what was with all the commotion and was promptly ignored, leaving the room uninterested. The cat slyly followed after him, magnetized.

Eventually, Haym managed to snag another win by a hair, only a millimeter of health left on his character. He pumped his robotic fists in the air. “YES! Oh my God, that was close. That’ll teach you not to mess with the Haymster, little brother,” Haym teased.

“You haven’t schooled me just yet,” Eloni pulled his brother back down to the couch. “And that nickname is stupid. It makes you sound like a pet rodent.”

Haym, cocked his head coyly. “So what? I’m just as cute, aren’t I?”

Eloni shoved his brother’s face away. “Shut up and game, would you?”

After another tense three minutes, Eloni managed to win again. “No fair!” Haym accused. “I didn’t even know you could  _ do  _ that in this game! That round totally didn’t count.”

“What? It’s not my fault you didn’t know that was a thing!” Then again, neither did Eloni. He only knew because Purl told him. “Just take the L, bro.”

Haym grumbled something but conceded. It was two-two right now, meaning there was only one more round for the winner to take it all and make his brother’s hair look like it belonged in Eve’s gallery. Both of them were about to start the battle with the intense heat of determination, when the sky outside suddenly rumbled. Eloni barely noticed, too intent on winning the game, but Haym picked up on the sound far too acutely. He got distracted just as the announcer commenced the battle, allowing Eloni to get a combo in right away. Haym snapped back to reality, regaining his eagerness to win.

As the battle between the two brothers got more and more intense and turbulent, so did the weather. Rain began to pour hard onto the mansion, creating a cacophony from the water hitting every surface it could find. Haym’s breathing picked up, and it wasn’t because he lost the first round. “Just one more round and you can say goodbye to your rocket head, Haym,” Eloni taunted, oblivious. The sky groaned some more.

The next round started and Haym’s head was out of the game completely. His hand fidgeted and jerked as he held the controller, unable to focus on executing combos and countering his brother’s attacks. He tried again and again to steady his breathing and pull through, but he couldn’t. Instead, he could feel his core processor begin to pump into overdrive.

Just as Eloni was about to gleefully deliver the final blow, a bright light flashed through the curtains, followed by an ear-splitting roar of thunder tearing through the heavens. The sound seemed to reverberate throughout the entirety of the mansion for far too long. Both androids could feel it echo in their metallic bodies. Haym’s controller dropped from his hand as he panickedly brought his hands to the sides of his head, shutting his optics tight as a drum. He must have made a pathetic sound, too, because Eloni yelped in shock and confusion. 

“Haym? Haym!” Eloni quickly dropped his own controller, rushing to his brother’s side. He didn’t expect the storm to come so soon and so strong. Haym was crouching tightly, trembling and murmuring to himself. “Oh my gosh,” Eloni cursed, a bit frazzled.

Eloni pulled his brother off of the floor and onto the couch, careful not to pull him too hard in such a vulnerable state. He pulled Haym close to him, placing his arms around him, as if to protect him from the raging weather. Tears pushed their way out of Haym’s sealed optics, his breath was staggered and erratic. Eloni could hear growing whispers, incoherent and unnerved. “Calm down, Haym. It’s just a storm, okay? We’re inside the mansion, we’re safe, okay? We’re safe.” Eloni tried to reassure his brother while gathering his own scrambled thoughts. It didn’t seem like Haym could hear him anyway. It was hard to hear anything over the roaring rain and the howling wind outside. How had this storm picked up so fast?

The younger android pulled his brother closer and stroked his back gently. His other hand went to grip Haym’s. Another roll of thunder boomed, this one much weaker than the last. Still, Haym shuddered fiercely when he heard it, curling up into a tighter ball and squeezing the robotic life out of Eloni’s hand. The green-haired android wouldn’t be surprised if his organ would be dented after this, but he couldn’t bring himself to care right now. 

“Make it stop,” Haym whimpered. His grip tightening on both his hair and Eloni’s hand. “Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop, make it stop.” He rambled for a good long minute like that. Eloni lost count of how many times the phrase was repeated. His own worry was growing, but he kept his apparent calm. When Haym couldn’t use his words anymore, he started sobbing loudly and uncontrollably.

Eloni’s core processor ached at the sight of his brother like this. He mentally cussed himself out. The news had warned them more than sufficiently of the storm’s severity. He should’ve known better than to sit and play video games in one of the mansion’s outermost rooms. Haym’s astraphobia was deathly. The slightest bit of thunder was crippling if he wasn’t prepared for it. 

Every time Haym had a panic attack, Eloni’s mind was yanked back to that day over a decade ago in an attempt to recall what to do. The little Haym had wandered a bit too far and got stranded outside in a horrible thunderstorm. Neon J tore the grounds up looking for his son. It was exceedingly dangerous for a walking mass of metal to be out in the open during such weather. Fortunately, Haym got out physically unscathed but deeply, deeply scarred. Eloni racked his memory banks, trying to remember exactly what their Dad did to calm Haym down.

When it finally struck him, he nearly leapt out of his seat. Before he did, he tried to tell Haym as clearly as he could that he would be back in just a minute. Eloni anxiously let go of his brother and rushed out of the living room. Haym couldn’t even protest. He hardly had the faculties to register that he was alone, even. The thunder had shoved him deep into a tiny room in the circuitry of his mind. There were so many growling voices inside of it, and Haym could mentally only run around that room, trying to escape the noise, but being unable to. In the physical world, Haym barely even felt his own hands tapping violently against the sides of his head, unintentionally introducing more clanging sounds to his senses. He was muttering something over and over, he didn’t even know what.

It felt like forever before he finally felt something warm and soft fall over him. He finally allowed himself to open his optics, his grip on himself loosened. Eloni had returned, bringing with him a fuzzy yellow blanket and draping it over his brother. The younger android pulled his brother into another tight hug, holding onto him as if for dear life. Thankfully, Haym threw his arms around Eloni’s waist as well, pressing his face into his shoulder.

Eloni put his hand on Haym’s head, resting his own head on top of it as well. He gently and idly stroked his back with the other hand, letting his brother ride out his tears and his attack in safety. "It's alright, Haymie. I'm here," he reassured his brother.

When Haym's breathing finally went down to a more normal rate, Eloni began to sing. It wasn't like their regular singing voice, it was far from it, actually. It was a series of beeps, clicks, and whirrs that probably sounded like a malfunctioning printer to most humans. To the androids of Barraca Mansion, however, it was rhythmic and melodic. When they were children, this was Neon J's lullaby to 1010. It was a digital tune that he probably loved to sing himself. It never failed to calm them as baby androids, but most of them grew out of its effects. It mostly only brought back a warm and cozy feeling of nostalgia for them, but in situations like this, it brought Haym back to a safe mind space.

When Neon J would sing it in public, Zimelu and Purl-Hew looked like they would die of embarrassment, but Haym went out like a light every time. Even though it was Eloni singing it right now, the lullaby worked like a charm. Haym’s choking sobs eventually dissolved into slightly seizing snores. Eloni sighed internally, but kept singing for a good few minutes after he was sure Haym had fallen asleep.

The youngest 1010 had no idea how much time had passed in that position, but he listened as the wind and the rain and the thunder subsided. After a while, the entire living room was quiet again. The weather outside had calmed down for the day. The game on the TV automatically shut itself off. And Haym was fast asleep, still clinging to Eloni. His breathing was the only thing Eloni could hear until two sets of heavy footsteps approached him from behind.

Eloni craned his neck around to see who was coming, putting a finger to his lips in a shushing motion. It was Purl-Hew and Zimelu. Scraggy was resting blissfully on Purl’s blue head, while Zimelu held in his hand a plastic rectangle of sorts. “Oh fuck,” Purl-Hew said, tone hushed. “Is Haym okay?”

“Yeah, the storm was pretty rough,” Zimelu added. Both of them had worried looks plastered on their metallic faces.

Purl-Hew scoffed. “I told you two to go deeper into the mansion because the damn thing was about to hit. Did you not hear me at all?”

Eloni only shrugged and gave his brothers a sheepish look. “Yeah, I guess the competition was a bit too intense. Sorry. I took care of it, though.” He smiled at them.

“Wonderful,” Purl sighed. He strode over to the other side of the couch and took a seat next to Eloni. Scraggy hopped from blue hair to green, resting in Eloni’s ring. Zimelu leaned over the couch on Eloni’s other side.

“Check it out, dude, I got us a new game from downtown.” He showed off the shiny packet. The cover was colorful and artistic. In front stood what looked to be two musicians. One of them held a saxophone, while the other one had a keytar strapped to their back. The title read,  _ A Lack of Linear Paths _ . “Looks cool, right? It’s fresh off the shelf  _ and  _ it has co-op. I was thinking the four of us could play once Crayola over here wakes up.” Zimelu pointed to the sleeping Haym. 

“That would be great, Zim.” Eloni beamed but kept his tone hushed. “I’d love it if we had a rest first, though. It’s been a tough week for all of us.”

“All good, all good.” Zimelu hopped over the couch, careful not to shake it too much lest he wake up Haym. The redheaded android landed on the floor next to Eloni’s foot. He placed the game on the coffee table before kicking his feet up onto it as well, leaning back and putting his hands behind his head. He sighed contentedly and closed his optics. Next to Eloni, Purl-Hew shrugged. He took off his shades and placed them delicately on the table as well, resting his head on the back of the couch.

When all of his brothers’ fans began to whir peacefully, Eloni clapped softly, shutting off the lights as the sun appeared to set outside. Purl’s head eventually lolled onto Eloni’s other shoulder while Zimelu leaned on his thigh. It was three heavy metallic heads leaning on his body, along with a cat on his head. Eloni didn’t mind. His core processor felt full. This was nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said in the beginning notes, I felt bad making Haym's chapter not fully readable for some people, so hopefully this one could compensate :(((
> 
> Don't worry about the fact that Purl and Zim (and Scraggy) were in this one, though. I had something else in mind for the real last chapter. Stay safe, all !


	6. Magnum Opus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a particularly rough day to cap off a rough few months, the youngest member of 1010 finally pays his father a visit.

Deep inside Barraca Mansion, a small complex of facilities was housed. Adjacent to each other were a laboratory, a workshop, a security room, and a storage unit for robotic parts and motherboards. Each facility was generally self-sufficient, with everything an engineer could possibly need to assemble fully functioning robots. This was Neon J’s safe haven, his paradise. Down here, he could do all of his research and robotics, far away from the hustle and bustle of the rest of the mansion. He loved his boys to death, but they were sometimes the death of him. Living with five teenage boys was bound to be a headache for anyone over the age of thirty. Even if that head was a fully mechanical radar.

It was a regular afternoon in the middle of April. Despite the heat, J was, as usual, holed up in his workshop, working furiously on a new project. The project was apparently so important that he opted to stay behind at the mansion while 1010 went on a daytime gig at the Grand Qwasa. The recent software updates to the boys’ systems seemed to be serving nicely. J felt self-assured that his sons would be acting more maturely from now on. If the updates were a bust, he was still confident that 1010 would be on their best behavior. The gig involved several NSR megastars, and was being overseen by Tatiana herself. If there was one thing the boys feared more than their captain’s aggressive barking of orders, it was that flaming tower of a woman.

J continued working his soldering rod expertly on the panel, joyfully humming an autotuned tune as he did. This was going to be a marvelous creation.

“Dad?”

“Argh! _ARGHHH!!~_ ” The sudden voice nearly startled out of his body the few human organs Neon J had left. His own jolting reaction made him accidentally grab the hot iron, eliciting a loud and painful, but characteristically autotuned scream from the man. Quickly recollecting his bearings, he turned to see which of his sons had decided it was a good idea to sneak up on him. “Who is it?”

“Dad! I’m sorry!” Eloni rushed over to assist his father. “It’s me, it’s Eloni. I didn’t mean to—”

The cyborg put his other hand up, stopping his son in his tracks. “At ease, soldier. I’m alright,” J assured his son. The android dutifully stepped back to a respectful distance, straightening his posture. J straightened his posture as well, shaking off his singed hand. It wasn’t actually that painful as his robotic hand was made to withstand much more than a soldering rod. It was simply hot and sudden enough to shock the semblance of nerves he had in the limb. He turned his attention to Eloni. “What are you doing home so soon? I thought you boys were headed to the Akusuka district after the gig? Speaking of which, how did the gig go?”

Eloni opened his mouth, but hesitated and closed it again. He tried to process all of J’s questions, unsure how he wanted to respond. He decided to answer the easiest question he could. “We decided not to go to the afterparty. The others are upstairs, sir.” Eloni’s voice was sheepish but sure.

“Oh? Did something go awry?” Did the boys metaphorically bomb their routine? Unlikely. Did they get on Tatiana’s nerves somehow? Maybe. Did it simply rain unexpectedly? Possibly. A dozen potential explanations pulled up in J’s mind, but he waited for his son to respond.

“Uhhh,” Eloni found it difficult to meet his father’s...radar. He took a short but deep breath before deciding to speak. “Yes, sir.”

Neon J stared expectantly at his son, waiting for further elaboration. If anything dangerous had happened, he realized he would’ve been notified in some form already. When his youngest son remained silent but attempting to form words, J surmised that whatever happened was a more personally troubling issue. The cyborg walked to a nearby bench and sat down, dramatically patting the space next to him, motioning for Eloni to sit. 

The android complied, stalking over to the space and sitting down, planting his elbows on his knees and slumping over. He still couldn’t face his father directly. “What happened, soldier? I want a full report.” J said. His words echoed their typical military phrasing, but he tried to keep a soft, jesting tone to his voice. Hopefully, it came across as intended and didn’t intensify the boy’s nerves.

Thankfully, Eloni seemed to understand. After scrunching his metallic face slightly, he was finally able to muster up a straight sentence. “It was horrible. I-I mean, it started out great, and the whole thing was going so well. Everyone was loving it. There were so many people, and it was working, Dad! I mean the whole re-angling thing we talked about? People were actually cheering _my_ name! My gauge had never been so turned up before. It felt amazing.” Eloni let himself gush a bit, actually smiling as he recounted the feelings he had experienced earlier. It was sweet, and Neon J felt his heart warm, but he kept silent. He knew the worst of it was about to come. Eloni continued.

“But I fucked it up.” There it was. Neon J leaned back in his seat. “It really did feel good, the cheering for me, but I was careless. I let it distract me and-and I messed up the choreo big time.”

It couldn’t have been that bad, J thought. He was confident in his boys’ abilities. He had personally programmed and trained them, after all. Before he could even voice his thoughts, Eloni interjected and answered the yet unspoken question. “And it wasn’t just a little flub, Dad. It wasn’t just a lag or a flat, it was-I was…” He trailed off before fishing his phone out of his pocket. J watched him open some social media application and search a couple of words in the bar on top. It took a few seconds of loading and scrolling, but Eloni finally tapped on a video, bringing it to fullscreen, and showed it to Neon J.

Whoever was filming clearly wasn't a professional. The camera was constantly moving and shaking for a good ten seconds, barely being able to focus on anything. Judging by the glimpses of a familiar set design and lighting, J guessed the footage was of the gig that day. When the camera finally settled into a stable angle, the figures of 1010 came into view and sharpened. J watched his boys sing and dance to the song he had taught them, executing the choreography to a tee. He scanned each of them individually. Rin was charmingly flashing a smile, Purl-Hew’s face was its usual set of cool flat lines, Zimelu’s brows furrowed angrily but he was smirking, and Haym danced with his tongue slightly hanging out of his mouth. It was the typical routine, save for Eloni, whose previously bashful and innocent demeanor had been replaced by a cheerier, more carefree persona. J could see what he meant earlier. Despite the quality of the footage, Eloni was very obviously enjoying himself more than usual. The cyborg waited patiently for something unexpected to occur, scanning every inch of the stage.

Truthfully, J was still expecting that Eloni would simply raise the wrong hand or jump just a foot off from his supposed position. He didn’t expect the chaos that ensued seconds later. Eloni did raise the wrong arm, straight into Purl-Hew’s chin, knocking the blue android’s glasses off of his face. The impact distracted both androids from dancing, the older one probably slightly dazed as well, clutching his face in his hands and stumbling backwards. A few collective gasps emerged from the audience. A couple of fangirls audibly shrieked as well. The panic and confusion was written on the other three android’s faces, but they kept dancing, unsure of what to do and likely expecting their brothers to get back into rhythm as Neon J always instructed. That didn’t happen as a distressed Eloni looked in the audience’s general direction, one of his glowing eyes flashing red. Suddenly, Eloni’s bio-shield sprang to life, sputtering erratically around him right as his other brothers moved into their next blocking. Haym hit the force field at an angle, losing his balance for a bit and distorting his singing. Zimelu, however, was jumping straight into the side of the field, colliding with it harder than his brother and bouncing to the floor in the opposite direction. Rin was thankfully far from the commotion, but he stopped his performance, quickly turning his head to the side of the stage and clicking the music off.

A cacophony of reactions wafted from the crowd, some gasps, some screams, many murmuring an ‘oh no’ or a ‘woah.’ Eloni looked mortified, eyes wide and both red now. He shuffled around his spot in a panic, unsure which of his brothers to help up first. Rin rocketed to the very front of the stage, attempting to draw attention away from the mayhem. He spoke into his microphone, saying the standard damage control and assuring everyone that they were alright. Haym quickly got his bearings and took his place beside Rin, catching his spiel and throwing a few jokes. As the pair bantered, Zimelu and Purl-Hew got to their feet, saying something to Eloni but Neon J couldn’t make out their mood. Eloni rocketed off the stage, leaving his brothers to exchange confused glances before chasing after him. Rin and Haym awkwardly but professionally closed the number before exiting the stage as well. The video ended.

Neon J struggled to construct the right sentence to say. He wasn’t often rendered speechless. He turned his monitor head to look at the son next to him. Eloni’s breath was heavy, tears welled up in the corners of his optics, and his cheeks were glowing profusely. “Are your brothers alright?” J clarified first.

Eloni nodded forcefully, his hand trembling as he put away his phone. “Y-yes, sir. No damage reported, but-but I broke Purl’s shades. He’s really mad at me. They all are.” The android sobbed, choking on his words as he said them. It was true. 1010, unsure of what to do, packed up and went home the minute the gig ended. Fortunately, Tatiana didn’t yell at them. If anything, she was more surprised. Eloni’s older brothers, however, let him have it on the ride home. 

“Dude, what the hell was that?!” Zimelu had demanded.

“You broke my glasses!” Purl-Hew complained, clutching them in his hands.

“What were you thinking activating your shields like that?” That was Rin.

“I didn’t plan on doing stand-up today, what the—” Haym said.

“You’re lucky no one was damaged severely.”

“Speak for yourself, I’m fucking embarrassed as hell!"

“Shut up! We’re all embarrassed!”

“Dad is gonna turn us into scrap metal.”

“ _You broke my glasses!_ ”

The youngest android could barely process the onslaught. He didn’t even have answers to their questions. He could only cry silently in the limousine. He was crying again down in his father’s workshop.

“I’m so sorry, Dad,” Eloni said through his tears. “Please don’t get mad at the others. It was all my fault. I’m so sorry for disappointing you like this. I-I-I—” The android choked on his words again. He growled frustratedly at himself, covering his face with his hands.

Neon J felt his organic heart break for his son. He was aware that implementing increasingly complex algorithms and emotions would be difficult for them, but it was necessary. He cursed the calls he had to make. He pulled his son into a tight hug, keeping his head held high while tucking Eloni’s into the crook of his arm. It had been a while since one of his sons let him hold them like this. J wished it had been under better circumstances. Regardless, he was here for his son, letting him cry and mutter apologies in his embrace.

“Do not apologize, my son,” Neon J said, stroking the android’s green curls with his hand. “I could never be disappointed with you. You, all of you, are my greatest creations, my pride and joy, my magnum opi. There is no error that you could commit that would change this fact. Please remember that.”

Eloni peeked his optics up at his father. “But-but I—”

“But nothing. It was an honest mistake. I am certain you were doing your best. As for your brothers, I know they are unharmed. These are all that matter. Do you understand that, Eloni?” Neon J held his son’s face in both his hands, lightly pressing his thumbs into the android’s cheeks.

“I-I,” Eloni’s optics darted from side to side. J was squeezing his cheeks a bit now. It was a bit of an awkward position as his father’s featureless face bore into him. “Yes, sir.”

“Good.” J dramatically and abruptly shoved his son’s face back into his arms, eliciting a quiet ‘mmph!’ from the boy.

“Let me tell you something, my son. You might know that I built all of you with meticulous care and thought. I poured myself into sculpting every single one of your features. Every delicate strand of hair. You might also know that you took me the longest to complete. It was a full six months since Haym’s completion when I finally brought your tiny robotic body online. Oh, how joyous was the day when I first heard your digital cry. Those beeps and hums wiped away all the months of sweat and sleepless nights. Right then, I knew it was worth it.” 

Eloni settled comfortably into the position now, holding his father’s arm. He barely noticed that his tears were nearly gone as he listened to his father’s words. The cyborg kept on his speech. “What I might not have told you before is just how special you are. Of course, each of you have become so unique in your own rights. That factory was a terrible idea from the beginning. You, however, took all the artistry I had left in me. After making your brothers, I was set on creating something truly one-of-a-kind, truly odd in the best way imaginable. It took countless nights at the drawing board, countless strolls through Eve’s galleries, countless discarded drafts before I came up with you. Your dotted brows, your melodic voice, every chip and code that builds your gentle soul, and, of course, that ring on your head. The same ring that you told me time and again that you hated as you grew older. What you failed to realize was that thing that you were teased for, that thing you cursed in the workshop when you thought I couldn’t hear, was a symbol of what had always made you special.”

Neon J took a deep breath to collect himself, trying to remember where his train of thought was headed. Eloni breathed calmly beneath him. “I am aware that you have had struggles lately. I am eternally grateful that you have found such reliable confidantes in your brothers. God only knows how important it is to have comrades. I apologize if I have not been as present as you would have liked, if you have felt that I have not provided sufficient explanation behind my actions. Tell me, Eloni, how have you felt in the past months? I would like to hear all about your experiences with emotion, if you would indulge me.”

Eloni nodded against his father’s chest, pulling himself from the embrace and sitting upright. He faced forward as he recounted every struggle he had in the past year or so. He told J about his outburst regarding the fanmail, his jealousy for the attention his brothers received, his disgust and confliction at the harassment of fans. He even told him about taking in a stray cat behind his back and how much joy it gave him. J tutted him, but said nothing else on the matter. For every anecdote, Eloni tried to tell his father with as much detail that his processors could muster about his battles with emotions.

“It used to be so easy,” he said after the retelling of the most recent breakdown in the limousine. “We’d laugh and smile when we played, cry or pout when we didn’t get what we wanted, and go back to normal after a while.” Eloni could almost imagine painting such emotions in black and white. “Why couldn’t we stay that simple? Wouldn’t it be so much easier for you, too?”

Neon J nodded. He was expecting this question, not just at the start of the conversation, but ever since he decided to implement deep, complicated algorithms into his sons’ systems. Algorithms that would simulate the emotions and thinking tied to young adulthood with laser accuracy. He dreaded every time he had to address this query. It was always going to be difficult, but it was inevitable.

“I must say, Eloni. I am honestly surprised that you would be the second to ask me such questions. After your eldest brother came to me some time ago, I expected Purl-Hew to soon follow. Not only was he the second in age, but he always had such a sharp wit. Even I felt winded when he would speak to me of his philosophies and poetry. It is impressive, but _wooh~_ ” J huffed, punctuating his last word with his autotune. He and his son both laughed at the remark. “You, on the other hand, always held such simple joys. You were always the first to cry, but you never failed to be the easiest to satisfy. What’s more, you always enjoyed the most minute thrills of life, down to the tiniest of caterpillars and infant flower buds. I suppose, in retrospect, that curiosity for organic life should have indicated to me that so many questions would form in your circuits. That your understanding of what it meant to be would develop much differently than your brothers’.”

The android tried to piece together his father’s words. He nodded once he felt he understood. J took the signal to keep speaking. He put his hand firmly on his son’s shoulder. “Now, my son, I want you to listen very carefully to my next words. It is important that you understand my intentions moving forward, lest you become raging killing machines. That is something I don’t think Vinyl City would ever be prepared for.” He shook the thought from his head. Eloni looked at him confusedly, but obliged. “At any rate, I opted to give you all of these turbulent thoughts and emotions when I did as it would be the best way to simulate for you the human experience.”

J sighed, looking around the room as he considered his words. “Actually, I detest that word. ‘Simulate.’ I would never imply that all of you are mere facsimiles, only running sequences in an attempt to replicate what organic humans already do so naturally. Perhaps, Mother Nature never intended for herself to be replicated by man and his machines. Nevertheless, it all comes back to what _I_ built you to be from the very beginning. I built you to be human. I intended for each of you to experience life independent from each other, to discover and follow your own dreams. Had I wanted fully sentient beings, aware of the world and their power to act in it, but devoid of compassion, then I would never have gone through the trouble of building your infant bodies. Of all the oil-stained diapers I had to change. Of slowly upgrading you part by part over the years. I certainly would not have put myself through managing five indestructible, and infinitely energetic little android toddlers. Perhaps, one day, you’ll find yourself relating to my struggles. Who knows?”

“The point is, I decided to painstakingly design, execute, and maintain every stage of human life, recreating the experience from scratch. All in an effort to nurture in each of you a heart. And I do not mean your core processors. No, I meant your curiosity, your passion, your sympathy and care for others. Humanity, as I have realized through my many brushes with death, is much more than just consciousness or intelligence.”

J turned his screen up towards the ceiling. After a few seconds, four extra dots appeared on his screen in sequence, each playing a soft and unique note when they pinged. One dot was red, another one yellow, then blue, then finally, white. “If your stories of the previous months are anything to go by, then I would like to believe that I made the right choices. All of you seem more than sufficiently equipped with compassion and care for one another, as well as for lives beyond your own—which is the only reason why I’m letting you keep that cat.”

Eloni’s eyes widened, slightly embarrassed at the callout, but happy for the permission nonetheless. Neon J quickly shifted back into their original conversation. “I know it might be difficult to see right now, but even your brothers’ earlier bouts of anger, and your mortification and remorse all indicate to me that we’re on the right track. Without all the grief, the frustration, the fury, the envy, the fear, all of your triumphs and joys would be hollow. You cannot know the highs without knowing the lows, as I always say.”

Neon J returned his gaze to his youngest son beside him. “Eloni, I am oh so proud of you. You have never failed to impress me with your efforts, but you have grown so much so quickly that I’m relieved to still be able to witness it. You’ve taken strides and made changes in your life with battle-hardened conviction. In all honesty, it feels like only yesterday that you were teething on some pastry while I fixed your hair into this very ring,” He affectionately pinched the circle of hair on Eloni’s head. “I also long frequently to return to those days. We were all so close back then. Everyday was exhausting, but filled with the joy of being with my boys. Regardless, you've all grown into such fine troops today. I couldn’t be more glad.”

“It’s all thanks to you, Dad.” Strangely, Eloni expected himself to tear up again, but no tears came. The words reverberated in his system, making him feel all types of emotions all over again. He thought he would be weak and vulnerable and soft in this moment, but he found himself gaining strength and resolve instead. It was something to get used to, he supposed.

“That’s where you’re wrong, soldier.” J tapped his son on the forehead. “I may have programmed you and laid the groundwork for your development, but all of the work, all of the struggle was yours. You have no one to thank but yourself.”

“Thank you, Dad. This all means a lot to me.”

“Anytime, my boy.”

Eloni shrugged to one side, putting a hand behind his neck awkwardly. “I uhh…I love you, Dad.”

“Don’t be so hesitant to tell me, or anyone, those words. It is no weakness to say them, but a strength. Otherwise, you’ll wish you would have had that strength to say them to someone when you can no longer do so.” J shook the thoughts from his head again. This wasn’t the time. “Lucky for you, your father loves to shower his boys with affection!” He grabbed Eloni and put him in a playful headlock, rubbing the base of his hair ring with his fist. 

“Dad! Stop!” Eloni protested through bouts of laughter. Eventually, J did stop and cleared his throat.

“I love you, my son. Thank you for coming to me today. I’m elated to have had this conversation with you.” He knew he had to have it thrice more, actually. He silently wished that he had recorded it this time. Oh, well. Eloni smiled sweetly at him.

“At any rate, I am not just your loving father,” J stood up. “I am also your manager. I believe some calls to Tatiana will be in order. Not to mention the upgrades to your shields. I would need to call in for some parts from Cast Tech.” He was about to pull out his phone when he glanced at his son’s expression. “But those calls can wait. I ought to spend some time with my son. Follow me, soldier.”

* * *

Neon J sat behind the wheel of one of their smaller vehicles, with Eloni in a comfortable hoodie seated in the passenger seat. “Do you still think this is a good idea, Dad?” 

“I’ve won dozens of battles using my wits, alone, soldier. This is a good idea.”

Eloni nodded and glanced back at the pile of items in the backseat. He and J had spent a solid three hours out shopping in the city. The sun was still up when they left, but it was well past dinner time when they were returning home.

When the father-son duo arrived back at the mansion, they hurriedly unloaded all of their spoils, hauling them to the dining room. Fortunately, the service bots had already set the table with a sumptuous feast as per J’s instructions. Glasses of oil were placed at every seat. There was a ton of highly flavorful human food as well. Even more fortunately, everything seemed untouched, meaning the others hadn’t emerged from their rooms yet.

Eloni and J sat on the floor next to the table, not wanting to disturb the orderly setup. Together they placed their handful of items in little cardboard boxes, which they then clumsily wrapped in colorful papers and ribbons. The android then placed each box underneath each one of the seats except for his and his father’s.

When he felt like everything was ready and presentable, he had the service bots call his brothers. He put his hands on his hips, proud. “This was fun, Dad.”

“Indeed,” J nodded.

“I really hope they like it, and, y’know, forgive me.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure they’ll appreciate the gesture.” J took his seat at the head of the table. “If they don’t, I’ll ground them.”

Eloni chuckled as he made his way to his seat across from his father. He waited patiently, nervously, and excitedly all at once for his brothers to arrive. Not too long after, they emerged into the dining room one by one.

Rin was first, of course. Prompt as usual. He had changed out of his costume and was wearing his favorite lavender polo shirt underneath a tan sweater. “Oh, Dad J!” He said. “You’re here.” Rin took his seat next to his father. He looked at Eloni, hoping to read an answer from his expression. He turned back to Neon J. “You’ve probably heard about the incident?”

“Don’t worry, soldier. I’ve heard all about it and more.” Rin gulped at that.

Zimelu came in afterwards in a Goolings tank top, rubbing his optics and yawning. “Yo, Dad,” he said before seeing the food. “Woah, this looks great! Did I, uhh, forget someone’s birthday again?”

Haym rushed in next, his hair tied back and slightly damp. “Sorry, sir! I was taking a shower.”

Purl-Hew finally arrived last, wearing a turtleneck and a new pair of shades. Scraggy trailed lazily behind him. The android apologized when he realized everyone was waiting on him, but shook his head when he met Eloni’s gaze. Scraggy leapt into Eloni's lap.

When everyone was settled in, Neon J spoke. “Good evening, troops.” All the boys saluted in reply. J eased their gestures down in acknowledgement. “I’ve been made aware of today’s events, but I am not here to scold you.” J rubbed his screen as the others breathed sighs of relief. “I realized that I should be here more often for you all. I am your father and your manager and your captain, yet my presence lately might indicate otherwise. I apologize for that, and I am here now. In addition to that, your brother,” he gestured to Eloni, “has also felt the need to make amends and lift your spirits. Eloni?”

Eloni nodded enthusiastically, hugging his cat to his chest. “Right. So, before anything else, I’m really really sorry for messing up our performance. I promise it won’t happen again, and Dad has made the updates to ensure that. Still, I wanted to make it up to you guys. Not only for today, but for everything you’ve done for me in the past few months. You’ve all been the best.” He smiled at them. “Now, if you would all look under your seats, Dad and I went out and got some stuff for you all.”

The brothers dutifully did just that.

“Is it a car?”

“What is this, The Coprah Winterfree Show?”

Each of the brothers revealed individual boxes of varying sizes. Haym violently shook his next to his ear. “Christmas came early this year!”

“Go ahead, open them.” Eloni beamed even greater now.

Haym was the first to rip his gift open and pull out its contents. It was another sleek video game packet. “No way! The new _Arthropod-Man_? This thing hasn’t even been released yet! The graphics are spectacular, I’ve seen so many trailers. Oh, and the gameplay is supposed to be really cool, too!”

Next to him, Zimelu excitedly exclaimed what he got. “Aw, wicked! Nunchucks!” He whirled the thing above his head. “I’ve been meaning to get some but the ones uptown suck. This is so awesome. Thanks, guys.”

“Of course, Zimelu,” J replied. “But not around fragiles, understood?” The red-haired android nodded. Eloni leaned over and whispered to his brother.

“And they’re bladed, too! Dad doesn’t know, though so keep subtle about it.” Zimelu’s optics sparkled at his new toys.

Rin opened his large box and gasped when he saw what was inside. “Is this a _Limited Edition Series Twelve Masked Theater Ghost Variant Paw-Paw Panda_?!” The eldest android coughed inauthentically, glancing nervously at the others. “I mean, a plushie! Wow! Thank you, Eloni, Dad.”

Everybody laughed as Purl-Hew carefully unwrapped his present. Inside was a sophisticated looking case. “Oh my god!” He said, opening the container. “Michelle Cores’ spring sunglasses collection! I’ve been dying to get my hands on these, and they’re _assorted_.” He took off his current glasses and tried on one of the pairs from the box. He smiled expectantly at the others as he showed it off. It looked exactly the same to Eloni. Still, he smiled supportively. “Beautiful,” Purl-Hew sighed.

Eloni was glad to see all of his brothers receive their gifts so warmly. He petted Scraggy. He got a gift too, a giant cozy cat castle that Eloni still had to assemble later. That wasn’t all he had in store, though. “If you guys could check the bottom of your boxes, there’s a little something I put in there, too.”

The boys confusedly and curiously dug into their apparently not empty boxes. Each of them pulled out a handful of small plastic squares. “Dad and I dug around the memory banks and fished out a few snapshots from all of us growing up. Thought it would be a nice little throwback.”

There were a myriad of memories contained in the photographs the androids held. Twelve year old Zimelu and Eloni covered in flour while Haym laughed in the background. Little Eloni and Purl-Hew popping just their heads out from inside a bush, smiles wide. Neon J and all of the boys smiling together as they gathered around a young Rin after his first recital. Eloni carrying a fourteen year old Haym on his shoulder as the latter waved around sparklers. Fourteen year old Haym getting his head bandaged by Purl-Hew next to a tree that Eloni was hiding behind. A warm, cozy photo of a cyborg sitting in front of a Christmas tree, a tiny toddling android in each of his arms, on each of his legs, and on top of his head.

The mechanical family spent the rest of the evening trading stories about all the funny scenes depicted in the pictures. It was as if the earlier incidents had never even happened. Neon J was content to be with his sons, laughing together like it was the old days. Eloni, tired as he was, smiled the whole night long. Whatever higher power was up there, he couldn’t thank them enough for giving him four of the most amazing big brothers one could ever ask for, a father with a gigantic heart, and a cat. He shed one, singular tear from his optic, finally crying from genuine happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to believe I saved the best for last and gave the Neon J fans out there some needed father-son bonding. Thanks to literal walls of Neon J monologues (which I think is pretty canonically in-character for the guy!), this chapter is twice as long as the regular ones, but it was fun to write nonetheless. This whole fic was really fun to write, actually. Now that I got it out of my system, though, I kinda need to focus on other stuff for the time being. Hopefully when I get back, I can write about less gloomy scenarios. I love these boys so much.
> 
> A really quick side note, too: the reason why I chose to specify in the start which month this chapter happened, was because it takes place on April 10 which is aptly Siblings' Day!
> 
> Thank you to everyone who's read til this point! I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I did writing!


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